Malcolm O. Munro - The "Career Fitness" Coach

Dealing with a Wimpy Boss

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What do you do with the boss who won't use their authority to actually be the boss?  What if you work with someone who delegates the tough tasks for someone else to do?  How do you handle the boss who refuses to take charge?

I'm going to suggest seizing control if the boss won't choose to exercise it!

Now before I blast this week's bad boss, let me suggest that in some ways, this behavior can be explained.  Many people think the path to organizational success is to work your way to the top.  In fact, being at the top is a sometimes daunting place to be.  Nobody can prepare you for the hassles and stress that await you.  In the face of that stress, the new boss may turn back to old habits, behaviors, and even tasks that they held before the promotion.  And confronting problems?  They either go completely over the top or they shrink away. 

You have no control over how your boss makes this transition.

Here's what you can do:

1. Start asserting yourself!  If you've always wanted to try something new or do something a different way, this is your chance.  Get your act together, build the process, and put it into practice.
2. Take charge of your immediate area.  You don't need positional authority to be a leader.  I know you probably don't agree, but keep in mind leadership doesn't need a title to happen.  Management does.  Start thinking strategically and voice your thoughts.  Demonstrate you know how to add value and get busy doing it.
3. Be a good example.  If your boss demonstrates wimpiness, be the opposite and act decisively.  This is your chance to show the higher-ups you're qualified for bigger things.

There are some people who wait for opportunities to come to them.  If you have this type of wimpy boss, you have an opportunity to really demonstrate your worth.   Get busy this week building your own leadership and management skills! 

AND, if you're this type of boss, you're a complete disappointment to me.  Somebody thought enough of you to hire or promote you to that leadership role.  You better start acting in that role or find another line of work.  Leadership is a privilege.  Treat it as such!

Are you rude? Maybe you should think again

Fed up with the rude behavior you experience day in and day out? Is it aggressive driving, co-workers who don't wash their hands or smokers who use the sidewalk as their personal ashtrays?

What about the sales clerks who ignore you -- then act like they own the store when you finally get their attention?

It's time for a return to civility!  To read more from Oprah.com, click HERE!

Dealing with an Arrogant Boss

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Imagine if we still had kings like they did in the old days.  They would strut around with their big robes and crowns, compelling us to bow down as they moved through the streets.  At the sign of any criticism, they'd simply single us out for decapitation. 

Some of us unfortunately still live this way.  Arrogant bosses, the "kings" (and "queens") of our days still rule some workplace kingdoms demanding workers pay homage to their greatness.

Arrogant bosses exhibit a sense of entitlement, an incessant string of comments about how great they are, an attitude that demeans others of lower rank or position, and a focus on their needs over the needs of others.  If you're sharing a particular story with someone and they overhear it, they'll chime in with a similar story of their own.  At their least annoying, they'll simply be in your way.  At their worst, they'll inundate your day with deliberate arrogant pain. 

Here are some quick strategies on how to deal with them:

Don’t:

• Openly confront them – they would enjoy beating you down
• Try to one-up them – this is their game and they know how to play it
• Attempt to compete with them – why bother?  It’s a losing game

Do:

• Ignore them – they thrive on an audience and accolades – a silent or non-existent audience completely deflates them!

Of course the best way to deal with tyrants is to just not do it.  In this tough economy that may not be an option, but your sanity may dictate you make the move.  Whatever you do, don't become a clone of your boss.  Without a formal mentor program and development, that is always a scary potential outcome!

Dealing with Bad Bosses: The Screamer

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We're in our second week of figuring out how to deal with bad bosses.  This week's culprit is the screamer.

Screamers fly off the handle at the slightest provocation.  Why?  Their anger is an emotional response to outward stimuli.  It’s a fancy way of saying people get ticked off when actions fail to meet expectations.  According to Daniel Goleman, the “guru” of Emotional Intelligence, our brains are open systems, which, unlike our circulatory system that flows in a continuous loop, take in outside information and process it. 

What does this mean?

If you can’t manage anger, it just grows.  This is why  rage escalates.  Your only hope is to get out of the way until it subsides.  Angry people are irrational. Irrational people can’t be reasoned with. Your rational response will only put fuel on the fire. 

Don’t:

• Attempt to calm them down
• Rationalize with them
• Argue or further provoke them
• Take a swing at them

Do:

• Keep your cool
• Make a conscious effort to control your own response
• Wait for the right moment to revisit the issue when they’ve calmed down

In some ways, this boss is the most dangerous because their anger can provoke ours.  Keep in mind that positionally, they outrank you so your response will probably lead to the demise of your tenure at the company.  If screamer behavior is causing you undue stress that's affecting your personal and physical well-being, it might be time to find a new position.

If there is good news here, I think it's that screamers become caricatures and what they do to motivate simply makes them look foolish.  Still intimidating, but foolish.  They will never be seen as a leader. 

Which Jobs are in Danger of Going Away?

As the impact of the economic crisis takes hold, employees from Wall Street to Main Street are feeling nervous about their jobs, and with good reason.  As of September, 760,000 jobs have already been lost this year, according to data from the Bureau of Labor Statistics.  And a quarter of U.S. employers expect to make layoffs in the next 12 months, according to a recent report by consulting firm Watson Wyatt.

But which industries will suffer the most? Experts say certain sectors are more vulnerable to layoffs than others.  To read which ones, click HERE to get the full article from CNN.com

Dealing with Bad Bosses: The Unpredictable Time Bomb

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There you are, busy at work when your boss appears.  He begins yelling at you in front of everyone about your missed deadline.  His insults then turn personal.  You feel your blood pressure rising and muscles tightening.  As he moves into your personal space, you smell his bad breath and cheap aftershave.  He then grins and he hurls one last insult.  That’s all it takes – you shove him down and proceed to kick his head in like a watermelon, the cheers of your coworkers rising in the background.

Well that’s what you wanted to do anyway wasn’t it?  Most likely you slinked back to your cube, head down with your tail between your legs. 

This week the mailbag was full of questions on how to deal with bad bosses.  For the next several weeks, I'm going to answer them and give you some suggestions on how to deal with your bad boss.  This week's question comes from Carrie F. from Bowie, MD.

Dear Coach,
My boss is evil.  I never know what he's up to until he blows up at me.  Then he slinks back to his office like nothing's happened.  We can't stand his unpredictability.  None of us knows what he'll do next but we all feel very uncomfortable.

Carrie, I call bosses like yours the Unpredictable Time Bomb.

The scariest thing about these tyrants is their unpredictability. It’s like the sudden air pocket drop you experience on a calm airline flight.  Worse, they can shift mood right before your eyes after drawing you into their comfort zone, dropping the hammer on you when you least expect it.  The Time Bomb also exhibits a talent for hitting your with rage and insults while smiling.  I once worked for a boss who smiled all the time.  The only way you knew he was about to explode was when his face turned red and he began to rapidly grind his front teeth, all while still smiling.  He reminded me a little of the rather disturbing Burger King King. 

To deal with the Time Bomb, you’ll have to carefully study them.

Don’t:

• Turn your back on them – always be wary

• Be taken in by their sometimes charming behavior

Do:

• Respond to everything they say and do to you with caution

• Observe their behavior – watch for things that seem to trigger them

• See if patterns develop – are you doing something unconsciously that sets them off?

Remember, even in tough economic times, it's sometimes better to quit your boss than to put up with unhealthy behavior.  Use your HR Department if need be.  At the end of this series, I'll give you some very clear steps to take when trying to handle ALL bad bosses.

When this recession or whatever it's called is over, people will be leaving their companies in droves.  It's happened after every economic downturn and will happen again.  The bad bosses will get theirs and then some. 

How to be an INTRAprenuer

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Last week I showed you how to add value (and job security) to yourself by learning how to solve four types of problems.  Hopefully you've had a chance to put some of that knowledge to use.

This week we want to focus on helping your organization make money.

You've probably heard of entrepreneurs.  These are people who start their own businesses, often at great risk, for the reward of having control and being able to make dreams come true.  Entrepreneurs (and I know this from being one) are forced to think critically about every dollar that's spent and make the most of each opportunity to try and make money. 

Even if you're not up for this rollercoaster ride, you can still use principles we use and become an INTRApreneur!  I know that terms sounds weird, but it makes total sense.  To add value, you have to think of your organization as YOUR company.  Here are some suggestions to get your INTRApreneurial spirit engaged: 

1. Look for new markets.  Think of this company as your own. If you can't see opportunities coming down the road, your company can go bust.  This is your chance to do some networking and prospecting on behalf of your company. 
2. Establish networks.  Let people know where your work and what you do.  Think of ways to find common connections with everyone you meet.  Show them that your company is one they should do business with.
3. Think of office resources as your own.  In my home office, I count paperclips, paper, and other office supplies.  I have to pay for these so I control their use.  It comes right off my bottom line.  I know the temptation to leave with little things from your office, but remember, it comes off YOUR bottom line.  Protect your office from this kind of innocent pilferage.
4. Come up with a constant stream of innovative ideas.  In the old days, new ideas were probably swept under the rug or stolen by other office mates.  Nowadays, your ability to come up with a creative idea may save your company from going under.  This isn't the time to play games.  Make sure you communicate with everyone above you if you have a great idea.

I know these seem like they should be the responsibility of someone else, but if your own job security is on the line, don't you think you might want to step up?  Remember, job security is never a guarantee with the same company, but if you can do the four steps above, you'll learn some powerful techniques that will make any organization a success. 

And who knows, maybe someday that business you're protecting will be your own!

How to Be a Problem-Solver

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Last week we learned the best way to get job security was to ADD VALUE to your current organization.  Adding value is done by:

• Solving problems
• Helping your employer make money
• Getting along well with others.

This week we'll focus on the first one.

I'm sure most of us benefit from the fact we regularly solve problems.  Our normal week probably includes at least one work-related problem per day and a host of problems at home.  With regular practice, we've probably gotten pretty good at it.  The key though is the type of problems we solve and the longevity of the solutions.  The best way to gauge our ability is to look at the two types of problems most of us encounter.

1. Short Term - These are problems that give us headaches in the moment and come without warning.  These could be a moderate annoyance or a critical issue that can cause great harm.  The solutions to these problems are quick and result in instant abatement of the problem.  Examples could be a shortage of material, a machine that stops working, or a crucial staff member that calls in sick at the last moment.
2. Long Term - These are chronic problems that have a history of plaguing us.  They may be mild in nature or severe enough to cause hate and discontent but are somewhat systemic in nature, meaning we don't know why the problem is here or where it came from, we just want it gone!  Examples could be a useless and time-consuming meeting or an archaic approval system that takes forever to come through.
3. Process problems - These are issues with a system itself.  A key supply or component takes too long to come in when ordered or service and repair work never seems to get done on time. It could be related to an inflated performance management system or even the way promotions are awarded.
4. People problems - These are issues that directly relate to a specific person or group of people.  This normally focuses on attitude and behaviors that are caustic and disruptive.

Now the question is:  How do we solve these problems?  

First, you'll need to accurately diagnose the problem.  Figure out which one it is before jumping in to solve.  Next, you'll need to pinpoint the root cause of the problem.  There's no point solving a symptom - find the main cause and solve it.  Think about tools like a Fishbone Diagram.  Finally, look for a long-term solution.  Short term solutions merely push the real solution down the line either handing it off to someone else or allowing it to grow in strength and plague you in the future.

If you make a point of identifying one chronic problem per day (and this means not whining about it!), that would be a start.  SOLVING the problem would make you an all-star, and as we discussed last week, all-stars have job security, if not with a current employer, then certainly with a strong competitor.

This week, think about how you'll apply this information.

How to Make a Wise Decision

The following is my one and only reference to politics.

Well at long last the speculation is over on running mates, the ornate and over-the-top conventions have ended, and we are ready to enter the final stretch to election day.  Of course we can now expect to be  inundated with political TV commercials, the scary music and ominous sounding narrators telling us why the other candidate will leave America poor, destitute, and at the mercy of terrorists and other threats.  We can also look forward to suddenly-learned scandals, verbal gaffes by all candidates when they thought a microphone was turned off, slips of the tongue that manage to offend at least one group of the population, and one or two documents tying one or both candidates to some type of sordid deal someplace.

Somewhere in this process, we'll be expected to pick out our choice for President of the United States.  It's a right and a privilege to vote.  I'm going to ask you to choose wisely.  I'm also not going to tell you who to vote for or who I'm voting for.

Choosing wisely is something we have to do on a daily basis.  It's not easy considering the forces that are out there to influence us.  To help us, we need to first identify our values.

Values are those things we hold dearly to.  Some have been with us since our early childhood while others are added along the way.  We won't change our values although we can sometimes question WHY we have the values.  That's healthy.

Secondly, we need to be mindful of our attitudes.  These are how we live out our values.  Advertisers know we won't change our values, but we might change our attitudes.  Political ads try to work our attitudes since experts know there's no hope of adjusting values.  We might hate oil companies because they strike a nerve with our values, but an ad showing how oil companies are working to improve our environment might make us feel a little better in our dealings with them.

Third, we need to look at all aspects of a situation before making a decision.  Deciding on a solution based on only one set of outcomes might reveal new problems or exacerbate existing ones.  Consider all sides before making decisions.   Look at short and long-term outcomes.

Now that you understand that, apply the same process to your choice for President.  Don't vote blindly because you've always voted for that party, are focusing on just one single issue, or are taken in by a particular look of the candidate or their background.  This decision is way to important to be swayed by the press, the media, or advertising agencies and focus groups.  You'll have to live with your vote (as well as your daily business decisions) so make the most of it.

What do you think?

Lessons in Pain from a Poison Oak Exposure

Would you like some great advice this week?  Never, under any circumstances, should you ever attempt to remove Poison Oak using a weed eater.

3 weeks ago I got a little lazy when removing some weeds under my Leyland Cypress trees.  I suspected there was some poison oak in there but it was hopelessly wrapped around my neighbor's fence.  I figured the weed eater would make my job much easier.

Everything was fine for the first three days, but then I found myself itching all over.  It never got better.  I tried all sorts of over-the-counter remedies until I finally gave up and went to the emergency room where I was given Benedryl and steroids.  Believe it or not, I'm still scratching as I'm writing this.  Just 10 minutes of exposure has produced 21 days of misery.

Fast forward to this past Wednesday.  I was co-facilitating a workshop where we used a tool called a fishbowl to allow participants to talk about hurtful events in their past.  It was a very powerful and emotional experience.  The most amazing thing was that many of the events that caused years of trauma only lasted a few minutes, some of them just an offhanded comment that took seconds to speak. 

It reminded me a little of that poison oak experience.  Short exposure and lasting pain. 

The lesson I learned is that whatever I may do and say to anyone could in fact affect them for a long time.  A careless comment or hurtful word can cause a person harm in the moment and long after.  It's a very scary thought.

Have you ever considered the power your words and actions have?  Do you make comments in the heat of the moment and say things you later regret?  If so, I'd suggest being extremely cautious when getting emotionally charged up.  Something we say might feel great at the time, but the consequences can be significant.  Who knows how many people we have unintentionally hurt that are holding anger against us right now?  How many people have lost their dreams and goals because of what we may have said, even casually?  Makes me really curious but in a sense, I really don't want to know.

What can we do now?  I suggest going directly to anyone we can remember hurting and try to make amends.  I know it sounds tough, but maybe we can salvage a bad situation.  Secondly, we need to be really careful in what we say.  It's kind of like squeezing all the toothpaste out of the tube...you'll never get it back in.  Think about that the next time you're ready to unleash on someone. 

Now, where did I put my Benedryl cream?