Malcolm O. Munro - The "Career Fitness" Coach

Dealing with a Wimpy Boss

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What do you do with the boss who won't use their authority to actually be the boss?  What if you work with someone who delegates the tough tasks for someone else to do?  How do you handle the boss who refuses to take charge?

I'm going to suggest seizing control if the boss won't choose to exercise it!

Now before I blast this week's bad boss, let me suggest that in some ways, this behavior can be explained.  Many people think the path to organizational success is to work your way to the top.  In fact, being at the top is a sometimes daunting place to be.  Nobody can prepare you for the hassles and stress that await you.  In the face of that stress, the new boss may turn back to old habits, behaviors, and even tasks that they held before the promotion.  And confronting problems?  They either go completely over the top or they shrink away. 

You have no control over how your boss makes this transition.

Here's what you can do:

1. Start asserting yourself!  If you've always wanted to try something new or do something a different way, this is your chance.  Get your act together, build the process, and put it into practice.
2. Take charge of your immediate area.  You don't need positional authority to be a leader.  I know you probably don't agree, but keep in mind leadership doesn't need a title to happen.  Management does.  Start thinking strategically and voice your thoughts.  Demonstrate you know how to add value and get busy doing it.
3. Be a good example.  If your boss demonstrates wimpiness, be the opposite and act decisively.  This is your chance to show the higher-ups you're qualified for bigger things.

There are some people who wait for opportunities to come to them.  If you have this type of wimpy boss, you have an opportunity to really demonstrate your worth.   Get busy this week building your own leadership and management skills! 

AND, if you're this type of boss, you're a complete disappointment to me.  Somebody thought enough of you to hire or promote you to that leadership role.  You better start acting in that role or find another line of work.  Leadership is a privilege.  Treat it as such!

Are you rude? Maybe you should think again

Fed up with the rude behavior you experience day in and day out? Is it aggressive driving, co-workers who don't wash their hands or smokers who use the sidewalk as their personal ashtrays?

What about the sales clerks who ignore you -- then act like they own the store when you finally get their attention?

It's time for a return to civility!  To read more from Oprah.com, click HERE!

Dealing with an Arrogant Boss

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Imagine if we still had kings like they did in the old days.  They would strut around with their big robes and crowns, compelling us to bow down as they moved through the streets.  At the sign of any criticism, they'd simply single us out for decapitation. 

Some of us unfortunately still live this way.  Arrogant bosses, the "kings" (and "queens") of our days still rule some workplace kingdoms demanding workers pay homage to their greatness.

Arrogant bosses exhibit a sense of entitlement, an incessant string of comments about how great they are, an attitude that demeans others of lower rank or position, and a focus on their needs over the needs of others.  If you're sharing a particular story with someone and they overhear it, they'll chime in with a similar story of their own.  At their least annoying, they'll simply be in your way.  At their worst, they'll inundate your day with deliberate arrogant pain. 

Here are some quick strategies on how to deal with them:

Don’t:

• Openly confront them – they would enjoy beating you down
• Try to one-up them – this is their game and they know how to play it
• Attempt to compete with them – why bother?  It’s a losing game

Do:

• Ignore them – they thrive on an audience and accolades – a silent or non-existent audience completely deflates them!

Of course the best way to deal with tyrants is to just not do it.  In this tough economy that may not be an option, but your sanity may dictate you make the move.  Whatever you do, don't become a clone of your boss.  Without a formal mentor program and development, that is always a scary potential outcome!

Dealing with Bad Bosses: The Screamer

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We're in our second week of figuring out how to deal with bad bosses.  This week's culprit is the screamer.

Screamers fly off the handle at the slightest provocation.  Why?  Their anger is an emotional response to outward stimuli.  It’s a fancy way of saying people get ticked off when actions fail to meet expectations.  According to Daniel Goleman, the “guru” of Emotional Intelligence, our brains are open systems, which, unlike our circulatory system that flows in a continuous loop, take in outside information and process it. 

What does this mean?

If you can’t manage anger, it just grows.  This is why  rage escalates.  Your only hope is to get out of the way until it subsides.  Angry people are irrational. Irrational people can’t be reasoned with. Your rational response will only put fuel on the fire. 

Don’t:

• Attempt to calm them down
• Rationalize with them
• Argue or further provoke them
• Take a swing at them

Do:

• Keep your cool
• Make a conscious effort to control your own response
• Wait for the right moment to revisit the issue when they’ve calmed down

In some ways, this boss is the most dangerous because their anger can provoke ours.  Keep in mind that positionally, they outrank you so your response will probably lead to the demise of your tenure at the company.  If screamer behavior is causing you undue stress that's affecting your personal and physical well-being, it might be time to find a new position.

If there is good news here, I think it's that screamers become caricatures and what they do to motivate simply makes them look foolish.  Still intimidating, but foolish.  They will never be seen as a leader. 

Dealing with Bad Bosses: The Unpredictable Time Bomb

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There you are, busy at work when your boss appears.  He begins yelling at you in front of everyone about your missed deadline.  His insults then turn personal.  You feel your blood pressure rising and muscles tightening.  As he moves into your personal space, you smell his bad breath and cheap aftershave.  He then grins and he hurls one last insult.  That’s all it takes – you shove him down and proceed to kick his head in like a watermelon, the cheers of your coworkers rising in the background.

Well that’s what you wanted to do anyway wasn’t it?  Most likely you slinked back to your cube, head down with your tail between your legs. 

This week the mailbag was full of questions on how to deal with bad bosses.  For the next several weeks, I'm going to answer them and give you some suggestions on how to deal with your bad boss.  This week's question comes from Carrie F. from Bowie, MD.

Dear Coach,
My boss is evil.  I never know what he's up to until he blows up at me.  Then he slinks back to his office like nothing's happened.  We can't stand his unpredictability.  None of us knows what he'll do next but we all feel very uncomfortable.

Carrie, I call bosses like yours the Unpredictable Time Bomb.

The scariest thing about these tyrants is their unpredictability. It’s like the sudden air pocket drop you experience on a calm airline flight.  Worse, they can shift mood right before your eyes after drawing you into their comfort zone, dropping the hammer on you when you least expect it.  The Time Bomb also exhibits a talent for hitting your with rage and insults while smiling.  I once worked for a boss who smiled all the time.  The only way you knew he was about to explode was when his face turned red and he began to rapidly grind his front teeth, all while still smiling.  He reminded me a little of the rather disturbing Burger King King. 

To deal with the Time Bomb, you’ll have to carefully study them.

Don’t:

• Turn your back on them – always be wary

• Be taken in by their sometimes charming behavior

Do:

• Respond to everything they say and do to you with caution

• Observe their behavior – watch for things that seem to trigger them

• See if patterns develop – are you doing something unconsciously that sets them off?

Remember, even in tough economic times, it's sometimes better to quit your boss than to put up with unhealthy behavior.  Use your HR Department if need be.  At the end of this series, I'll give you some very clear steps to take when trying to handle ALL bad bosses.

When this recession or whatever it's called is over, people will be leaving their companies in droves.  It's happened after every economic downturn and will happen again.  The bad bosses will get theirs and then some. 

How to be an INTRAprenuer

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Last week I showed you how to add value (and job security) to yourself by learning how to solve four types of problems.  Hopefully you've had a chance to put some of that knowledge to use.

This week we want to focus on helping your organization make money.

You've probably heard of entrepreneurs.  These are people who start their own businesses, often at great risk, for the reward of having control and being able to make dreams come true.  Entrepreneurs (and I know this from being one) are forced to think critically about every dollar that's spent and make the most of each opportunity to try and make money. 

Even if you're not up for this rollercoaster ride, you can still use principles we use and become an INTRApreneur!  I know that terms sounds weird, but it makes total sense.  To add value, you have to think of your organization as YOUR company.  Here are some suggestions to get your INTRApreneurial spirit engaged: 

1. Look for new markets.  Think of this company as your own. If you can't see opportunities coming down the road, your company can go bust.  This is your chance to do some networking and prospecting on behalf of your company. 
2. Establish networks.  Let people know where your work and what you do.  Think of ways to find common connections with everyone you meet.  Show them that your company is one they should do business with.
3. Think of office resources as your own.  In my home office, I count paperclips, paper, and other office supplies.  I have to pay for these so I control their use.  It comes right off my bottom line.  I know the temptation to leave with little things from your office, but remember, it comes off YOUR bottom line.  Protect your office from this kind of innocent pilferage.
4. Come up with a constant stream of innovative ideas.  In the old days, new ideas were probably swept under the rug or stolen by other office mates.  Nowadays, your ability to come up with a creative idea may save your company from going under.  This isn't the time to play games.  Make sure you communicate with everyone above you if you have a great idea.

I know these seem like they should be the responsibility of someone else, but if your own job security is on the line, don't you think you might want to step up?  Remember, job security is never a guarantee with the same company, but if you can do the four steps above, you'll learn some powerful techniques that will make any organization a success. 

And who knows, maybe someday that business you're protecting will be your own!

How to Be a Problem-Solver

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Last week we learned the best way to get job security was to ADD VALUE to your current organization.  Adding value is done by:

• Solving problems
• Helping your employer make money
• Getting along well with others.

This week we'll focus on the first one.

I'm sure most of us benefit from the fact we regularly solve problems.  Our normal week probably includes at least one work-related problem per day and a host of problems at home.  With regular practice, we've probably gotten pretty good at it.  The key though is the type of problems we solve and the longevity of the solutions.  The best way to gauge our ability is to look at the two types of problems most of us encounter.

1. Short Term - These are problems that give us headaches in the moment and come without warning.  These could be a moderate annoyance or a critical issue that can cause great harm.  The solutions to these problems are quick and result in instant abatement of the problem.  Examples could be a shortage of material, a machine that stops working, or a crucial staff member that calls in sick at the last moment.
2. Long Term - These are chronic problems that have a history of plaguing us.  They may be mild in nature or severe enough to cause hate and discontent but are somewhat systemic in nature, meaning we don't know why the problem is here or where it came from, we just want it gone!  Examples could be a useless and time-consuming meeting or an archaic approval system that takes forever to come through.
3. Process problems - These are issues with a system itself.  A key supply or component takes too long to come in when ordered or service and repair work never seems to get done on time. It could be related to an inflated performance management system or even the way promotions are awarded.
4. People problems - These are issues that directly relate to a specific person or group of people.  This normally focuses on attitude and behaviors that are caustic and disruptive.

Now the question is:  How do we solve these problems?  

First, you'll need to accurately diagnose the problem.  Figure out which one it is before jumping in to solve.  Next, you'll need to pinpoint the root cause of the problem.  There's no point solving a symptom - find the main cause and solve it.  Think about tools like a Fishbone Diagram.  Finally, look for a long-term solution.  Short term solutions merely push the real solution down the line either handing it off to someone else or allowing it to grow in strength and plague you in the future.

If you make a point of identifying one chronic problem per day (and this means not whining about it!), that would be a start.  SOLVING the problem would make you an all-star, and as we discussed last week, all-stars have job security, if not with a current employer, then certainly with a strong competitor.

This week, think about how you'll apply this information.

Choose Your Attitude, Define Your Environment

Have you ever had a job you hated?  I'm sure you have.  If so, I'm also sure you had to put on a "face" each day in order to survive.

That "face" you have to put on is really a simple term for a great attitude.  It's making the choice to make the very best of a bad situation.

Yesterday, I went to the local grocery store to pick up some hamburger buns.  The cashier was so friendly and upbeat that I saw nearly every one of the grim faced customers ahead of me in line perk up and leave with a big smile.  It was amazing to see and experience the energy that her positive attitude had on everyone.

Contrast that with another of the cashiers in the same store.  Several weeks ago I went through his line and asked him how he was doing. 

"Bad," he replied.  "I'm so depressed that I can't even function."

Wow," I said.  "Is it REALLY that bad?"

"I'm so miserable here that there is nothing on this planet that can make things better."

It was kind of disturbing and somewhat frightening.  I could have been speaking to that Disney character Eyore.  I have no clue what was going on in that man's head or in his life, but for that day it even depressed me.  He's still there (I saw him yesterday) so hopefully he's been able to sort out what's going on.

Here's my point.  Regardless of how you feel about a situation, your attitude is your choice.  By making the conscious decision to be positive, you'll make those around you happier and start feeling better yourself.

Many years ago while serving in the Navy, I was arm-twisted into giving dental health presentations at a local elementary school in Cerritos, CA. for Children's Dental Health Week.  I was irritated, annoyed, and just plain old grumpy having to do this.  Interestingly enough though, once I made the conscious choice to be positive in front of the kids, I actually had a great time.  The kids fed off my energy and I fed off theirs.  Each class laughed, got grossed out at the nasty photos of rotten teeth I showed them, and probably left with a renewed interest in brushing their teeth.  I realized that day how much I enjoyed doing presentations and it pushed me into my current career - which I am grateful for each and every day!

So this week, regardless of the circumstance or situation, make an effort to be positive.  You can create your atmosphere and environment, positive or negative, so figure out which one you'd rather have!

Celebrating Life

It's 2:00 AM on Sunday morning.  I'm writing because I can't sleep.  The neighbor one street over has had a part all day long and it's continued on into the early hours.  There is loud music, people talking at the top of their lungs, and lots of laughing.  Normally, I would have called the cops by now.

This party is different though.  The banner out in front of the house reads "Rob's No Longer Sick Celebration Party."  About 18 months ago, parents in my son's lacrosse league were asked to become bone marrow donors for Rob.  I saw him about 8 months ago and he looked pretty bad.  It looks as though the story had a very happy ending.

It made me think about appreciating just being alive.  Most of my writing focuses on career advice and management & leadership training.  It's all about work and being more effective at work.  Perhaps it takes seeing somebody celebrate just being alive to make me understand more about the work/life balance dilemma.

I'm not going to stop writing on these topics nor will I ever quit encouraging you to find your dream job and be more effective in it.  I'll just check in from time to time and make sure you're taking some time to enjoy the hours outside of work.

So for this last week of summer, let's all take some time to relax, reflect, AND recharge for the upcoming months before the holidays.  It's the biggest harvest season for business people, job seekers, and consultants so we all need to take a deep breath before diving in.  Le-Chaim!

What's on Your Bucket List?

Last night I watched one of the best films I've seen all year.  It was The Bucket List starring Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson.  If you haven't seen it, I won't ruin the ending for you, but it involves two guys who both get the news they're dying of cancer and have just a few months to live.  They put together a list of the things they want to accomplish before they die and because Nicholson's character is quite wealthy, they have the resources they need and set off on their quest.  The rest of the story is funny and a little sad, even bringing a tear to the coach's eyes at the end (which rarely happens!). 

Today I'm thinking about my own bucket list - things I'd like to do before having to answer the final bell.  Here are some of them (and this list keeps growing):

• See Michelangelo's mural on the Sistine Chapel
• Run the New York Marathon
• Fight in a UFC mixed-martial arts event
• Shake hands with the President
• Climb Ayers Rock
• Sit on the 50 yard line in the Super Bowl
• Speak in front of a crowd of 100,000
• Have my own TV show

Now I know it may seem a little morbid to put a list like this together.  It's also impossible to know when your time may finally be up. 

Who cares?

If you knew exactly when you were going to die, you'd probably make the list.  Since we don't know that, why not treat every day like it may be the last?  That means working hard on important relationships, mending ones that are broken.  It means doing things that will create lasting memories.  Leaving a legacy.  Dreaming big dreams and taking steps to realize them.

This week, why not put a Bucket List together?  At a minimum, it will help you reveal long time dreams.  At best, it will be a great roadmap to help you navigate each day and allow you to give your very best to the people you care about the most.